Weddings are wonderful celebrations steeped in traditions.  Some traditions are great, like first dances.  Some traditions need to die.

Clinking Glasses for a Kiss

Maybe die was a bit extreme…but this tradition of banging your wine glass with silverware to get the bride and groom to kiss might just be the definition of obnoxious.  If you’re of the mind set that this is acceptable at your wedding, then I congratulate you on being a much more tolerant bride/groom than I was.  But if you’re desperately searching for a way out – you’ve found the right blog!

And whatever you do, don’t pretend that this won’t happen at your wedding.  Yes, there are unicorn weddings where everyone is totally respectful, reserved, and considerate during dinner.  Chances are this won’t be you, and why take the risk?  Check out these wedding reception hacks to prevent the ultimate clink-off.

Clinking Alternatives

Clinking Alternatives

Bride and Groom had different plans for their guests!

Below are some alternative that we suggest.  With each of these, your MC will introduce the rules towards the beginning of dinner to make sure everyone understands the kissing policy.  Keep in mind, even in the worst case scenario of no one participating in the challenge…at least there wont be any ruptured ear drums and broken wine glasses.

1. Sing a song with “Love”

This idea has become relatively popular, though it’s still likely your guests haven’t seen it before.  The rules are simple: if a guest wants you to kiss, they need to stand and sing any song with the word “love” in the lyric.  We often recommend that entire tables attempt the tune to add to the excitement.  There are no other rules, and the tunes can range from “All you need is Love” to the theme song from Barney.  If the lyrics say “love”, it counts!  (recommended for weddings with less than 200 people)

2. Kiss by Example

One of my personal favorites is what we call “Kiss by Example”.  If someone wants the couple to kiss, they need to come to the dance floor with a partner of their choosing and kiss each other in a way they’d like to see the Bride and Groom imitate.  This can get a bit creative, if not PG-13 rated, but it’s definitely good for a laugh.  And as long as the thought of your Aunt and Uncle kissing each other isn’t totally weird to you, this is definitely an alternative that your guests will remember!

3. Sports Physical Challenge

For the sports themed weddings, why not create a game for guests to play instead of clinking?  Something simple like a putt-putt golf challenge or a mini basketball hoop.  Sink your put and the Bride and Groom kiss!  You can make it as easy or as hard as you’d like…I guess it depends on how much you like your spouse!

This isn’t recommended for weddings with kids though.  Kids…bless their hearts…ruin weddings on a weekly basis.  It’s not their fault, they’re bored out of their minds.  Give bored kids the option to play with basketballs during dinner though – you’re going to run into problems.

4. Wheel of Fortune

There are a couple different takes on this concept, but the premise is based on chance.  Whether it is a wheel with many options, giant dice, or just a 50/50 chance, the person requesting that you kiss has to take some sort of risk to make the request.  If they win, you kiss, if they lose, they kiss someone.  I’ve seen this done with two different colored Hersey’s Kisses, or you can go all out “Wheel of Fortune” style with different levels of kissing (for both you and the person spinning the wheel).  If there’s some risk involved, people will think twice about spinning that wheel!

5. For a Cause

Our dueling pianos show is always happy to donate tips to a cause of your choice, but this concept can be worked into the kissing tradition as well!  It’s simple: have a box at the head table that says “$5 per smooch” (or any fee you feel appropriate).  Maybe you even give discounts for buying in bulk!  Kiss your girl, save the world?  Classy!

Clinking Ideas

Gotta Love Getting Mom Singing with a Fake Microphone!

6. Shots!

Maybe you’re the kind of couple who met over a romantic game of beer pong.  Maybe you’d like to commemorate that first date with a drinking game.  Why not?  Have your guests take a shot of something to get a husband/wife kiss to happen.  I’d recommend making it interesting though.  Leave the fireball shots for later at night…anyone like Malort?

7. Dance Party

You could always make your guests have to dance for you – I mean, this is a wedding, right?  Give them a dance challenge or dance move to complete, or challenge each table to out-dance the table previous to it.  If one person does the robot, maybe the next person can top it by getting 3 people to do the worm!  Bride and Groom get to judge…and laugh.

8. Create your own!

Why not be truly unique and just come up with your own kissing challenge?  The F&F team will be happy to help with creating some rules, but it’s not hard to come up with something customized for your wedding.  Maybe there’s an inside joke, special song, long standing dance, or family tradition you can exploit.  Come up with something funny that will grab people’s attention and chances are you’re on your way.  That being said, the following can easily backfire:

a. Anything involving a mic (drunk people and microphones don’t mix).

b. Anything too kid friendly.  If you think the kids might start trying to get involved, dig a little deeper for another idea.

c. Anything too easy or too obnoxious.  Ringing bells or yelling some arbitrary word or phrase can easily get out of hand.  Make people work a little harder for it.

The Moral

Clinking meant well…really, it did.  Then it quickly because the bane of every wedding dinner and people have been searching for ways to stop it ever since.  Unfortunately there is no stopping it as the tradition has pervaded wedding culture, but the replacement option will scratch that inevitable itch your guests will feel the moment they sit down for salad.  Many-a-couple have incorrectly thought “that will never happen at MY wedding”, but trust me…it’s coming.  Cut if off before it starts and have some fun with your guests, everyone will enjoy dinner that much more!

And of course, follow dinner with a Felix and Fingers Dueling Pianos show – we want to make your night amazing!  You can request a free quote here.

(Photo Credits to Katie Ricard:


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